Things I Wish People Would Say Episode 1

I got something to say

Inspired by the most recent HabsEyesOnThePrize podcast, which should be up shortly, here is a brief list of things I wish certain people in the hockey world would say instead of the canned bullshit they like to feed us every time they do something.

• “I traded him because he was mouthing off and I got Rene Bourque because that’s the only thing we were offered for him,” Pierre Gauthier, after the Cammalleri trade.
• “The reason I didn’t trade Rick Nash isn’t because we didn’t get any good offers, it’s because that was a fucking stupid idea in the first place,” Scott Howson, on trade deadline day.
• “I don’t play Cole on the power play because we’ve been getting off on the wrong foot and I’m vindictive like that,” Jacques Martin, when asked why he chooses to play Darche over Cole on the man advantage.
• “Don’t listen to anything I say about my hockey team, I’m making it up because I think most of you Toronto sports media folks are beyond stupid,” Brian Burke, all the time.
• “I don’t know what I’m on, either” Ted Leonsis, every blog post.
• “I just HOSED Pierre Gauthier, lulz” Jim Rutherford, after the Kaberle trade.
• “Get me out of here, I have no idea what I’m doing,” Randy Cunneyworth, every five minutes.
• “Get me out of here, I have no idea what I’m doing,” Scott Howson, every five seconds.

Huge thanks to the HabsEyesOnThePrize crew for inviting me to talk hockey with them. Ellen Etchingham, whose brilliant work you’ve read on the Backhand Shelf, was also on, so listen to it when it’s up for sure.

TAS NOTE: I am thinking of making this a regular, longer feature, with more timely stuff. Please let me know if you’d like to see more and also help me come up with some sort of graphic like real bloggers do. Much thanks!