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Pens – Habs Game 3: Things I know for sure

May 5, 2010
  • This isn’t the end of the world, nor is it the end of the series, so stop sucking on the exhaust pipes, Habs fans.
  • This series is turning out to be pretty dull.
  • If it gets any more boring than that game, these two teams should be forced to forfeit the rest of the playoffs. Let Philly and Boston play another round.
  • The Habs competed against that entitled little bunch of fuckers.
  • But they didn’t win because they held back on offense in the second and third.
  • And also Josh Gorges and Hal Gill in the penalty box at the same time is a major disaster when the score is [Number of Vancouver Stanley Cups] – [Number of Stanley Cups the Canucks have won].
  • And also the Penguins seem to have figured out that firing a bazillion shots at Jaro means that he will beat you.
  • Fleury is not as good as he looked. The Habs helped him out a little by having negative-14 shots on him after the first. I don’t know if it was Marinaro or Melnick who was saying that the way to beat Fleury is to shoot at him. Sounds about right.
  • The ultimate triumph of evil would be the Boston Bruins and the Vancouver Canucks in the SCF.
  • Mario needs some aloe vera or some after-sun cream or something.
  • New ‘History Will Be Made’ commercials do not need to come out after every game, NHL.
  • Ryan O’Byrne’s playoff beard is bigger than Sidney Crosby. In skates.
6 Comments leave one →
  1. Chris permalink
    May 5, 2010 10:21 am

    I’ve been laughing so hard at the playoff beards this year. For whatever reason, as a Leafs fan, I’m clinging to the ghosts of playoffs past by comparing today’s beards to Wendel Clark’s bearded divinity.

    If the Canucks win the Cup, I will start a petition to deport all of Vancouver’s inhabitants back to China (or South Korea/Vietnam). If the Bruins win the Cup, may whatever god you believe in help us all.

  2. Harry M permalink
    May 5, 2010 3:59 pm

    Good post Active Stick…like always!

    I personally think Sid is the hardest working player in the league and isn’t entitled to anything. It’s the Habs fans in the arena who think they are entitled to get every darn call when one of their guys takes a spill. It’s so annoying…i do think that the Habs will bounce back and pull one out tomorrow.

    Chris, i’m all for deporting illegals here in the States. I want to personally thank the Leafs franchise for the upcoming 2010 & 2011 1st rd picks. The 2011 one will be in the top 10 as well. The B’s are playing with house money right now. It feels good!

    • Chris permalink
      May 7, 2010 3:25 am

      Harry, I’d personally like to thank Richards for ensuring that the Bruins will not get anywhere in the Semi-finals.

      Also, I’ve been looking to make a bet with Bruins fans over the Leafs’ finish next year. No one seems to want to take up my bet that the Leafs will make the playoffs next year. I was correct about the Leafs finishing in the bottom three – ask Laura – so if you’re creative enough to come up with an interesting bet, I’ll happily take it.


      • Harry M permalink
        May 7, 2010 10:48 pm

        Chris, my apologies…I forgot to thank the Leafs incompetent front office for Rask…my bad.

        Enjoy being a fan of the team who I consider as the Knicks of the NHL.

        Big whoop if they make the playoffs. Lets bet to see if they finish ahead of the B’s.

        Once again, the B’s are playing with house money. Everything is gravy!

  3. Number31 permalink
    May 5, 2010 11:34 pm

    Hilarious playoff facial hair: Pouliot’s moustache. That thing should be illegal.

    I prefer Cammy’s negative beard.


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